Thursday, May 10, 2007

If I was 12 or retarded, I totally would have voted for Lakisha

Truly, this is a special time of year. The air grows warm, the blooms begin their shy emergence, and everything seems to buzz. Before they all died, the bees caused this buzzing. But nowadays, the buzz is from American Idol. For truly does spring now mean that we must be down to our final three.

this week's episodes, my personal sentimental favorite, Lakisha Jones, was voted off. Sad but true. She was one of those American Idol feel-good stories -- coming from nothing, and with no chance of getting a break any other way. So good for her. But in the meantime, now I'm left with the beat boxer (who has actually grown on me, although his beat-boxing on Tuesday was weak), odds-on betting favorite Jordin Sparks, and Melinda Doolittle. Let's break this down.

First of all, regarding Melinda. I think it's weird that Phylicia Rashad and Michael Ruffin had a child. I thought they were both married. What I want to know is, what did Ahmad have to say about all this?

+ =

Tell me you don't see it. I double dog freaking dare you.

In any case, Melinda is a shoo-in for the final. But part of me kind of wants to see Blake pull the upset and sneak in to face Jordin for the crown. Why? Not because I have anything against Melinda, but because then we would really see if this lil-ol-me routine is for real or not. I can just see Melinda getting the news that she was voted off, and then tearing off her shirt like the Incredible Hulk and stomping around the stage in a sports bra shouting out "Oh no you did NOT!" over and over again. So, you know. That could be fun.

But other than that possibility, this final three is fairly drama-free. Jordin is going to win and it's not gonna be close. The only real question to be resolved is, do I think she's hot or not. I need to think on this. I thought she was a little Amazonian for me at first, but it's a wonder what these stylists and trainers and wardrobe people and nutritionists and posture coaches can do for a contestant. Look at what happened with Katherine McPhee. But it's still too early to think of such matters, as I continue to mourn the passing of Lakisha. So long, Lakisha. If you ever get cast in a Broadway play, I'll seriously think about thinking about going, for a good solid two or three minutes. That is my promise to you.

- Mysterious Bee Killer Could Make Dinner Bland [CNN]
On 'American Idol,' Here Comes the Real Judge [Washington Post]
Jordin Sparks page [American Idol]
Katherine McPhee: Getting Warmer [No One Appreciates Me]

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Erin said...

I was going to DIE if anyone other than Lakisha got the boot. Thank God I no longer have to see her ingest the microphone. Jordin will definitely be battling Blake for the win. While I enjoy his occasional beatboxing, he'd better not beatbox his way through the finals--I don't think I could d-d-d-d-deal with that.

Jen said...

I don't like Blake at all. I think it's the frosted tips. It should be melinda and jordin, with melinda for the win. I can't believe I care ...