Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Hi, this is Jeff Reardon for Prozac

I never would have figured Jeff Reardon for this type. He had a great, long baseball career - they called him The Terminator. He was in that good class of 1980s bearded relievers, along with Bruce Sutter, Lee Smith, Dennis Eckersley, and the rest. He actually ranks above Rollie Fingers on the all-time saves list!

But now, 10 1/2 years after his retirement from baseball, The Terminator was recently arrested
for allegedly robbing a jewelry store. He made $11.5 million in his career, and robbed the store of $170. Err...WHAT?

What do I have to do to sell you this gold watch today?

Oh, how the mighty have fallen. But of course, part of this story is quite sad. His son, Shane,
died of a drug overdose last year. And for that, he was on antidepressant medication, on top of the heart medicine he was already taking. His lawyer is blaming the robbery on these medicines. Because, you know, that's a big problem with antidepressants. I saw it on the label one time. "Side effects may include drowsiness, watery eyes, and robbing." And hey, after the trial, I smell big endorsement dollars for Jeff on the pharmaceutical circuit.

In any case, I hope this ends all right for The Terminator. From the news stories, he doesn't seem like a bad guy - just a little crazy. And judging by that wild animal on his head, wouldn't he have to be? Just kidding. Kind of.


I.P. Daily said...

Back to your Christmas song post:

People tend to be Peanuts lovers or haters, and you my friend are a suspected hater. I appreciate the audio and visual masterworks of Charles Schultz, and I think the songs and shows get better with age. The art and music are simple and jazzy, and it's a lot better than some of the aweful pop efforts over the years (cite - Paul McCartney's "Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time", any song by Mirah Carey, and put it side-by-side to the Chipmunks, and clearly the old Schultz style dominates). Maybe you can't appreciate it because your family didn't have a television.


MSH said...

Just for future reference, you can comment directly on the post you wish to comment on, if you want. But I'm sure you knew that, seeing as how you grew up with television and other technology. All I can say is, at least I know how to raise me a barn.

I agree in general that poppy Xmas songs suck, but you MUST give it up to the Mariah Carey version of "O Holy Night." Say what you want about her (and I don't particularly like her myself, at all) but she can sing like none other, and she absolutely crushes that song.

Yeah, I'm a Peanuts hater. I think I'd fit right in with, you know, the Peanuts gang. If the Peanuts gang was running up to me to kick the football, I'd definitely pull it away at the last second.