Okay. I know it's only one week in real time, but in actuality, this Redskins season has been going on for six years now. Last night's piddling 19-16 loss to the Vikings was just a continuation of a theme from which the team only momentarily emerges for temporary bouts of success. So to that end, here is my ironclad prediction for the Washington Redskins season. Tell me if any of this sounds familiar.
1) Redskins spend offseason making sweeping coaching changes, high-fiving each other over high-profile free agent signings, reading own press clippings, and woofing about how they are definitely DEFINITELY going to the Super Bowl this year. Not trying to go. Going.
2) Season begins to much fanfare. They drop the first two games in close fashion, due to atrocious special teams, a disorganized offense, inability to stop other teams when it counts, strange and untimely penalties, and plain bad luck.
3) The losses pile up and become a losing streak, culminating with a brutally one-sided loss to a division rival or elite league team (this year, Week 5 at the Giants). Players and coaches shrug and make comments along the lines of "I don't know how to explain it, we're such a talented group," "we're just a play or two away," and "we're staying positive. It's only a matter of time before we turn this thing around."
4) Losses continue. Local and national media put out their annual midseason "What Happened To The Redskins?" pieces. Team is left for dead.
5) Team starts winning.
6) Team puts together winning streak. Fans and local media re-drink the Kool-Aid -- "They can still win the division!"
7) Team has big game that could determine whether they do, in fact, win division -- this season, Week 14 against the Eagles. Redskins lose.
8) Redskins win remaining games, talking all the while of "staying positive" and going for a wild card.
9) Team finishes 9-7 and can still get the wild card -- but they need some help! They need the Cardinals and Cowboys to lose.
10) Cardinals lose.
11) Cowboys win.
12) Despite missing the playoffs, team is "staying positive" due to late-season winning streak. "We're gonna be ready next year," says one player. "I think next year, we could do some big things."
13) Lather, rinse, repeat.
Sorry to be such a Negative Nelly, and I really hope I'm wrong. But am I the only one who feels like he's seen this movie before? Probably not. Go Skins...please make an idiot out of this fan (as you did last year) who's way too young to be such a pessimist.
- Kicking Themselves [Washington Post]
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