Thursday, April 19, 2007

Sanjaya kicked off Idol. What will I do without my favorite girl?

Well, it's a singing contest again. After Sanjaya got booted from American Idol yesterday, only the best remain. It's like making vodka. You evaporate, you distill, you expunge the impurities, and finally, with any luck, you have a clean product. American Idol is now that. Well, relatively anyway.


Why do you hate me so? Hmmmmmmm?

I'm not sure how entertained I'll be without my favorite young lady on the show, though. Sanjaya showed a lot of courage -- you know, for a girl -- as she put the criticisms aside and sang her heart out week after week. So what if she shat the bed every episode, only to be carried into the final seven on waves of pure sympathy? So what if her voice was barely audible? So what if she was style over substance? I, for one, thought this little lady showed a lot of moxie. You go, girl.

So take Sanjaya's departure, and add it to Haley Scar-not-ho's exit last week, and all the dead wood and baggage has been cleared. (By the way, Haley is now saying that the skimpy outfits are not how she wants to be remembered. But without them, how would you have gotten your gig at the Tropicana? But she also says she'd be open to modeling. Eh? Dudes? What did I tell you? Playboy right around the corner.)

So now, let's get down to the business.
I think next week, Phil gets the ax, followed by Lakisha (the "shocker"), then Blake, then Chris, and then Jordin beating out Melinda in a barn-burner finale. Let's get it on!

But not yet. That's for next week. For now, let us mourn the loss of Sanjaya, our most delicate flower. Forget the haters, Sanjaya. Five years from now, when you're running for president, you'll know who to thank. That's right. American Idol. And yourself, girlfriend. Thank yourself. Excuse me...I have something in my eye.

Hyperlinks:
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Hair and Gone: 'American Idol' Trims Sanjaya [Washington Post]
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Buh-Bye, Haley [No One Appreciates Me]
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Stems Fatale [Entertainment Weekly]

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3 comments:

Unknown said...

Very funny. :-)

I can tell you really love that non-singing 'girl'. So do I!

Anonymous said...

That shot and that haircut totally make him look like Whitney Houston circa "The Bodyguard."

Anonymous said...

Finally, we can get down to the serious business of choosing which of the remaining soulless, mediocre talents will be the next... American Idol.