Thursday, November 30, 2006

The Supreme Court has your number, Big Environment

The Supreme Court heard arguments on a big case yesterday: the case of whether the federal government is required to restrict global warming gases that are emitted by new vehicles. The case could eventually have a ripple effect on big power plants and what not as well. Lot at stake here. The court is supposed to announce its decision next year.

Personally, I am proud of the Bush administration for refusing to limit greenhouse gas emissions. It's about time someone stood up to Big Environment, that conspiratorial lobby that has its fat little fingers in every single aspect of our lives. And if you don't believe me, what about that recycling bin you thoughtlessly put on the curb each week? Yes -- that's Big Environment at work, sucking your dollars away and influencing every aspect of your life. Bet you never thought about that, huh? Jeez. I hate them SO MUCH!

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Lawyers for Big Environment convene outside the Supreme Court.

At least one person on the Supreme Court had the temerity to fight back against Big Environment. Justice Antonin Scalia (surprised? I know, me, too). When Scalia said he wondered about carbon dioxide's effect on the stratosphere, he was corrected by some Big Environment hot-shot, who was all like "it's actually the troposphere," to which Scalia responded:

"I told you before I'm not a scientist. That's why I don't want to have to deal with global warming, to tell you the truth."
This, of course, coming from the same justice who took it upon himself to spend much of the session questioning the scientific basis of global warming. Brilliant!

(Actually, this same scenario happened to me just the other day. Some guy's car was broken down on the road, so I put a bunch of carrots in his gas tank. And the guy was all like "how will that help?" And I said "oh, I don't know, but I did stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night." Genius.)

Anyway, I'm off topic. The point is, I like where Scalia's head is at. I think all these Big Environment flakes and communists should take a hike. If anyone needs me, I'll be sacrificing this goat in my backyard. Well, how do YOU cure a cold? With medicine? Sounds like Big Environment talk to me.

Hyperlinks:
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Court Hears Global Warming Case [Washington Post]
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Global Warming Basics [Pew Research Center]

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